An Exception
And since I had spent so little time in Judea among the churches of the Anointed One,
no one there could pick me out of a crowd. But stories of my call and mission preceded me:
“The very man who wanted to kill us all is now preaching the faith he once labored to destroy.”
And so they praised God for the miracle He did in my life.
Galatians 1:22-24
Dear Friends,
Sometimes I want to see myself as the exception to the rule, especially during this global pandemic. I am uncomfortable with the vaccine because I don’t like putting things into my body but I also don’t want to get the coronavirus either. I foolishly keep hoping to be the exception, opting out of either like I have a choice. But COVID-19 has invited most of us to recognize our mortality and how fragile life truly is—that death is a guarantee. Death is an unavoidable reality for us and everyone we love and this is sad. It’s okay to be sad. Even with the confidence of heaven for Lazarus, Jesus wept over his death and wept over the sadness of death.
Heaven doesn’t negate the sadness of death.
I wonder if Jesus’s disciples thought that, when it was time for Jesus to go, he would be caught up in glory like Elijah. Like Jesus could be the exception to death instead of simply a great example of life. While his life was a great example, it’s his death we find assurance in. Walter Brueggemann writes in The Prophetic Imagination that “God himself embraced the death that his people must die… not standing over against but standing with.” Not even God was rescued from death but went to the shameful cross, bearing the horrific pain and enduring the suffering, humanly feeling every bit of torture in his body until his body couldn’t bear it any longer.
God is not unfamiliar with our suffering, our uncertainty, our doubts, our sadness, or even our fear. In Christ, God felt it all.
There’s this story in the Bible about a man name Paul whose entire mission was to destroy the Christian church and to separate Christians from each other through prison or death. The best way to harm a person is by isolating them. But Paul had this encounter with the voice of Christ who invited him to lay down his weapons, his indignation, his pride and to serve Christ with that same fervor instead. From that moment forward, Paul wasn’t concerned about his own well-being or how he would make ends meet. He recognized his own mortality, how finite life is, and how every moment was an opportunity to love other people by sharing the love of Christ with them.
Death is a guarantee for each of us and no one is the exception. What freedom this truth can bring! This doesn’t make my sadness go away and it doesn’t lessen the grief, but it does lessen my white-knuckled grip on control. It holds an invitation to see every moment as an opportunity to love and be loved. To taste and see that God and life is good today. I may not know what tomorrow will bring and I might not be confident with what eternity looks like, but I know today I am loved by Christ and I am to bear Christ’s love. And even in sadness, this is enough.
With (love),
Bethany